Some Notes on Making a Seder for people who cannot stay up for the Seder and for making a Seder for young children – London, 2008/5768
The General situation
When does the Seder start?
On both Seder evenings, the Seder starts after nightfall[1]. Nightfall for these purposes is the time of ‘tze’ait hacochavim’[2]. This year in London (2008/5768), the earliest time to start the Seder is at 8.56pm.
How does this impact on Seder preparations?
This year, Erev Pesach (Pesach eve) is on Shabbat 19 April. As Shabbat is a day dedicated to Shabbat only, no Pesach preparations take place on Shabbat. Pesach preparations are finished on Friday, other than really final preparations such as laying the table (if this is not possible before Shabbat) or taking out food once Shabbat has ended. Shabbat ends at 8.56pm.
At this time, say the phrase ‘Baruch Hamavdil bein Kodesh leKodesh’ (a mini form of Havdala) and then you can move into Seder mode, including warming up food for the Seder meal within the parameters for warming food on Yom Tov.
Eating Matza is the only Torah based eating mitzva of the year (believe it or not given all the jokes about Jews and food!).
Therefore, we should get Pesach and the Seder right, sticking to this structure.
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The notes that follow apply only for people whose health will not allow them to participate in the proper structure of the Seder, or for young children who are unable to stay up for the Seder. They also pertain to those looking after people in ill health or young children.
People in poor health who cannot stay up for the Seder or have difficulty in eating Matza etc.
Shabbat 19 April and Sunday 20 April 2008
7.35pm[3]
Wash hands ‘Urchatz’; Eat a small amount of celery/parsley ‘Karpas’; Break the middle Matza and hide the larger half for Afikoman ‘Yachatz’.
Eat dinner whilst going through the ‘Magid’ section of the Hagadah, eg sing Dayainu!! Stop at the section beginning ‘Rabban Gamliel used to say’, which is close to the end of ‘Magid’.
8.35pm at the earliest
Recite Kiddush and drink the 1st cup as found at the start of the Hagadah (don’t worry, we’re not playing snakes and ladders so you don’t start the whole Seder again!).
Go back to where you left off before making Kiddush and continue with Magid from ‘Rabban Gamliel used to say’. Drink the 2nd cup and eat Matza, Maror, (if you are able to, eat ‘Korech’ as well), Afikoman. Say Birkat Hamazon / Bensching/ Grace after Meals.
Drink the 3rd cup of wine. Sing as much of ‘Hallel’ as you can and drink the 4th cup of wine.
This completes the Seder for people in poor health who cannot make the Seder at its proper time.
What about people whose health does not permit them to follow this schedule?
Start at 7.35pm as above. Matza may be eaten from 7.50pm but without making a beracha/brocha/blessing. The blessing can only be made after 8.35pm.
Stay up as late as you can and follow the instructions above.
How much Matza and grape juice should be drunk by people whose health makes it hard for them to eat and drink?
Matza
For each Matza eating, try to eat an amount of matza measuring 4 x 3 ½ inches.
If this is not possible, try to eat that amount for the first Matza eating and an amount equivalent to at least 5 grams for the other Matza eatings.
If this is not possible, eat one piece of Matza weighing at least 5 grams for the first Matza eating and at least 5 grams of Matza for as many of the subsequent Matza eatings that you can manage.
If you cannot eat Matza as it is, you can dip it into water to soften it.
Maror
If you can, eat either 20 grams of horseradish or Romaine lettuce measuring 10 x 8 inches. If you cannot eat this amount, then eat as much as you can but without saying a beracha/brocha/blessing on the Maror.
The 4 cups
Use grape juice if you prefer it to wine. Each cup should hold at least 86ml (that is less than half of a standard plastic cup so not very much liquid). Drink at least the majority of 86ml. Do not use leftovers from one cup for the next cup, instead pour out a fresh amount.
If you cannot drink grape juice or wine, drink cups of tea of at least 86ml instead, prepared from a ‘Shabbat urn’ which you filled before Shabbat started (as Shabbat this year is Erev Pesach). Unlike on Shabbat, the urn can be topped up on Yom Tov.
General Points
If you are helping somebody whose health compels them to begin the Seder early, you can join in the songs and discussion with them but you should not start the Seder yourself until nightfall as defined above.
If you need to care for a person in poor health at the same time as you participate in the Seder, make sure that minimally you drink the 4 cups in their proper order, say the major parts of ‘Magid’ (i.e. at least Ma Nishtana, Avadim hayinu, the 4 sons, ‘Rabban Gamliel used to say’ until the end of Magid), eat Matza, Maror, Korech and Afikoman. If possible, share the responsibility with another Seder participant.
Young Children who cannot stay up to participate in the Seder
- Make a mini-Seder for the children
- Depending on the age of the children, start as close as you can to nightfall.
-Involving your children, if possible, get a mini-Seder table ready.
-Sing songs and play Seder games with your children, discuss the story of the Exodus from Egypt and let them present any notes about the Seder that they may have prepared at school or at Cheder.
-Select one section of the Hagadah to discuss with your children.
-Give them some Matza and some lettuce for Maror and then follow that with their supper so that you give them as mini-Seder which is as close as possible to the real thing.
-It is important to understand the Magid section of the Hagada in particular and so read and discuss that in English except for the Berachot/Brochas/blessings.
If you have any questions, please email me
Chag Samayach! Have a Happy Festival of Pesach
[1] Since the Jews left Egypt on the night of 15 Nisan, which is the first night of Pesach (see Shemot/Exodus 12:8). Also see Shulchan Aruch OC 472:1. TB Berachot 27b, Pesachim 120b.
[2] Lit. the coming out of the stars. Often referred to as ‘3 stars’.
[3] As noted above, the Seder must begin at night. The earliest definition of ‘night’ in Jewish law is a time called ‘Pelag Hamincha’. This definition is a minority opinion in Jewish law. In a situation such as a person in poor health who cannot make the Seder at the right time, the minority opinion may be relied upon.
